THE TRILIMINAL SUBBUNE
Someday, March 32, 2020
Edition 31,000
BOX DIMENSION BRINGS WEIRD ANOMALIES TO DREAM WORLD
By: Porter
The dream world appears to be getting affected by an immense wave of weirdness that is being brought forth by a leak coming from the Box dimension.
According to the Dimension Protection Force, a large majority of dimensions across the dream world have been affected in some shape or form. Many of these dimensions are not behaving like they normally should, and some are experiencing glitches and errors that should normally be prone to computers.
“It’s really weird,” a DPF agent tells me, “But hey, that’s the Box dimension for you. Weird as heck.”
In order for the dream world to go back to normal, the leak coming from the Box dimension must be cleaned up. Upon cleaning up the mess, the dream world should slowly go back to normal and become less weird- at least, what’s considered normal.
The DPF has sent Nate, along with another agent, to help navigate through the domain of the Box dimension. While opening a portal to it would be easy, in order to get to the main dimension, they will have to travel through various sub-dimensions first.
“This won’t be an easy task, but luckily I got partnered with another agent for this task- and she’s pretty good!” Nate tells me, “She’s traveled across much of the dream world, and she has quite good memory…you’ll see what I mean when you meet her!”
The DPF does not have any leads or information about why the Box dimension is behaving this erratically nor does it know why the dimension is leaking this profusely. An investigation is currently taking place, alongside other investigations regarding recent strange matters in the dream world.
The agency expects this to persist for the next two weeks or so. Travelers are asked to use caution when going through the dimensions of the dream world, and to avoid tampering any dimension in the event of accidentally cleaning up evidence of any wrongdoing.
WEIRDNESS FELT ACROSS DIMENSIONS
By: Arial
A large majority of dimensions across the dream world are currently being affected by the Box dimension leak, spreading weirdness, strange glitches, and even defying the laws of physics to many of them. Here is a list of some of the dimensions that have been affected, and what to expect when visiting them:
Game: This dimension is upside-down! Players in this dimension are complaining that they cannot accurately play the game this way. (Not that it made any sense in the first place.)
Club: The Club is undergoing a computer-like error and cannot hold any dance contests at this time. DJ Techno is notably upset about this malfunction in the dimension.
Pool: Zombies appear to have taken over the Pool! They come for our brains, but luckily we know their weakness: plants!
Laundromat: Just like how the laundry machines turn as they wash or dry clothes, the Laundromat is also on its own head!
Island: A strange time anomaly hit the Island and it got sent back to January of this year when it was snowing pretty heavily!
Sidewalk: The Sidewalk has been skewed on its own axis and is forcing people to quite literally side-walk!
Cafe: This dimension is pretty weird…don’t look up.
Mall: A strange time anomaly also hit the Mall…it got sent back to the 2021 holiday season!
Backrooms: Forget the Backrooms, this is the Frontrooms now!
These are just some of the dimensions that have been hit by the Box dimension leak. If you are traveling through the dream world, exercise caution and be wary of where you step. There’s a lot of puddles and other weird things around- be careful!
Q/A: Ask Dylan
Dear Dylan, what’s your favorite color?
By: K. Lore
Hey K! You’re really going to ask the CEO of the color pink what his favorite color is?
Dear Dylan, what’s your opinion on spicy food?
By: Tu Hott
What up Tu! Not a big fan of spicy food. I prefer my food to be sweet in nature, because it matches my personality, duh!
Dear Dylan, what’s your family like?
By: Pham I. Lee
Hi Pham! My family is pretty small, unlike Epsilon’s. You see, I was raised by my dad, who also happened to be a postal worker. I’m an only child (funny rabbit joke here…) as well, so there wasn't really any family drama growing up. My grandparents on both sides have long passed as well, but my father is still around! He’s retired now, but I followed in his footsteps to also become a postal worker! I should go visit him sometime…
Dear Dylan, does pineapple belong on pizza?
By: Pete Sah
Hey Pete! Yes it most absolutely does and I will defend and protect this idea until the day I die!
Dear Dylan, what do you like most about Epsilon?
By: Kat Luver
Hey Kat! Epsilon can be too serious to the average eye, but he is very kind and sweet. He’s always stood up for me when I couldn’t as we grew up, so I think what I like most about him is knowing he constantly stands up and does good things for me. That’s love, I think.
Dear Epsilon, what do you wish most for your birthday?
By: Kay K.
A gigantic carrot cake that is bigger than me. Actually no, I think just spending time with friends is enough, but also with Epsilon of course! Or maybe some new headphones. Or a new shirt…
J/A: Joke and Answer!
What do oceans do when they pass one another?
They wave!
What did the speaker say when it was leaving?
Audios!
Why is it so easy to weigh fish?
Because they have their own scales!
Why do we tell actors to “break a leg?”
Because every play has a cast!
What do you call a human in the Backrooms?
Lost.
Why did they lock up the dream demon?
Because he broke the biggest rule of the dream world without permission and got caught. However, he managed to escape and probably lives his life hiding in the dream world.
Past Events:
Tomorrow- Friday: Best day of the week!
Yesterday- Wednesday: The middle of the week!
Next month- Bunny Takeover: Who doesn’t like cute rabbits? I know Epsilon does.
In 7 months- Halloween: Who’s ready to get spooky?!
Future- Blackout: Who turned off the lights?
Someday- Lucid’s Redemption: Do you really think he’ll get it?
December 16- Holiday Party 2021: Pull out the holl- wait, didn’t this happen already?
In 3,000 years- 5022: In 3,000 years, it’ll be 5022, and Lucid will still be alive to see it.