THE SUBLIMINAL TRIBUNE
Thursday, November 17, 2022
Edition 64
HEALTH DEPARTMENT EXPECTS NEAP-1 GONE BY DECEMBER
By: Porter
The DDCP has made thorough calculations based on recent data derived from recent trends in cases and antidote distribution within the last two weeks.
The health department says that it expects NEAP-1 to be virtually gone by the beginning of December, citing a dramatic decline in cases and a smooth distribution of the antidote.
“We’re confident to say that Neapworm will be gone by the time the holiday season comes along,” Ophelia says, “We’re still talking about it since we’re barely getting out of that shadow, but things are looking pretty good!”
As of now, there are still around 45,000 total cases of NEAP-1 that have been recorded since the beginning of the outbreak, but the DDCP is now reporting around or less than 10 a day. They expect this number to drop more as the days go by.
“We expect around five cases a day next week, and then around zero in two weeks,” Ophelia says, “We can do this, we have the antidote, we got this.”
As lockdowns and shelter in place orders get lifted, life in certain areas in the dream world is slowly returning to normal. Such is the normalcy that many dream world citizens have begun to go out and make their early holiday purchases ahead of the holiday season.
“Neapworm is a thing of the past now. I’m looking forward to Christmas!” a local wolfboy says.
“Halloween felt kind of off this year, but thankfully Christmas is coming and it’s going to be great!” a local fairy says.
In the meantime, NEAP-1 antidote distribution continues. This past week, the DDCP distributed 25K special pies. Production of the pies has slowed as many people are now recovering from it, but they still expect to distribute more pies in the upcoming weeks.
“Things have slowed down after getting just about everyone who got infected to take the antidote, so expect production to slow dramatically, but we’ll have some special pies stored around just in case,” Ophelia tells me.
For more information on NEAP-1 antidote distribution or other information relating to the matter, please visit the DDCP website.
CITIZENS GET READY FOR RETURN OF DINNER DIMENSION
By: Oswald
It’s almost the end of November, which means that the Dinner dimension is about to return.
As a seasonal dimension that really only appears twice a year, the Dinner dimension is exceptionally rare when it comes to making appearances. Nostalgists are predicting it’s going to return next week.
“There’s a highly good chance that the Dinner dimension will be back in a week,” one nostalgist explained, “We’re basing this off of historical precedent, so you can look forward to it in one week.”
The Dinner dimension is well known for being fancy, but for the food too. The food prepared in the Dinner dimension is quite exquisite, and many come to take a taste of it, as the dishes prepared are rare from the dimension.
“If you get to say you had a meal from the Dinner dimension, you’re pretty lucky!” a local chef told me, “Preparing dishes in the Dinner is rare, so I urge everyone to come check it out if they can!”
“The food there tastes really good,” Epsilon of the Apartments said, “It may be a lengthy trip, but it’s definitely worth it.”
The Dinner dimension usually comes back twice a year: once in November and once in December. The November arrival is a week long, but the December arrival is a little longer- usually around three weeks.
“I promise it’s worth the trip. Just know that the lines might be long, and you’re going to have to bring your own plate or two,” Epsilon explained, “I’m going to surprise Dylan with a dish. I know he really likes the carrot cake they provide.”
The Dinner dimension arrives in a week. Dream world citizens can expect a shortcut portal in the Backrooms, courtesy of Figment, when it arrives.
Q/A: Ask Nate
Dear Nate, what are some important things to always carry around in the dream world?
By: Bach Pak
Hello Bach! There are a few important items that one should carry when they’re out and about in the dream world.
First and foremost: a flashlight! It’s very important to carry a flashlight or some sort of light source when out in the dream world. Much of the dream world is very dark and foggy, so some source of light is important to carry with you to light the way! Whether it be a flashlight, lantern, torch, or your own light source, it’s very important to be able to see where you’re going!
The second thing I recommend carrying is a watch. It’s true that time doesn’t really correspond with the time of day in many areas across the dream world, but it’s still important to know the universal time wherever you are. Many dream world watches also include the date, so you’re always up to date (pun intended!) on what day and what time it is.
The third thing I would recommend is bringing along some sort of identification. There are plenty of IDs that you can carry around that can identify who you are, where you live, how old you are, etc. It’s important to carry this around in case a DPF officer stops you for whatever reason!
And if you feel like it's necessary, something to defend yourself with! There are baddies out there in the dream world, but it’s rare to encounter them. Should you encounter them, you should have something to defend yourself with! All DPF agents carry some sort of weapon with them, just in case something bad happens.
Those are just some things to consider carrying around, but I think they’re the most important! Of course, there’s the compass too, but those can be a little confusing to use in the dream world. If you’re out there exploring the dream world, have fun but be safe!
Dear Nate, why are there no rules for visiting the Void?
By: Raul Brayker
Hi Raul! You’ve probably noticed that there are no rules prohibiting anyone from visiting the Void, which is different from the rule prohibiting anyone from visiting the real world. There’s a reason for that! To understand the Void, we have to look at the past.
At one point in ancient history, a curious group of individuals would work on strange sorts of magic that others found intriguing. These same individuals would eventually end up finding the Void, but it was by accident! Upon entering the Void, they noticed that their magic no longer worked, and they were met with pitch blackness- literal nothingness, hence the name given for this world, void of life, water, and resources.
Eventually, a group in the dream world noticed their absence and managed to save them from the Void. When they came back, they told their stories of their encounter in this new world and documented it for future generations to learn about. This is why nowadays, we know that the Void is literally a vast empty plane of complete nothingness.
So why no rules? That’s the reason why! Since the Void consists of practically nothing, it’s not really of any interest for anyone in the dream world to go visit it. Like, what’s the point of going if it’s just complete blackness for miles upon miles? Plus, the Void makes your own powers null and useless; it’s not known why things like your own powers, electricity and other gadgets stop working here, but it’s also why it is not a good idea to go down there to visit.
If you get trapped in the Void, you’re practically helpless! If you have no powers, no electricity, no food, no water, and no place to shelter under, it isn’t the most pleasant experience here. Getting trapped in the real world is different, since at least you have electricity and other things to survive, but this is the one place a rule is set in place to not go. So while no rule officially exists for the Void, it’s just common knowledge to avoid it all together.
I wouldn’t be surprised if a rule gets placed on it one of these days, though! But I doubt it, since the Void is much harder to get to than the real world is. I wonder if anyone’s been there recently since that documented ancient report I told you about?
Upcoming Events:
Now- September 2022 archived: Another new portal addition in the Rewind room!
Now- Dimensions expanded: The Cinema and Castle have a little more to explore in this update, go check it out!
November 24- Dinner dimension returns: Gather around and let us give thanks once more.
December 1- Beach dimension returns: Like snow on the beach, weird, but it was beautiful.