Hey there chief, watcha doing here? You're not lost, are you? Hahaha, I'm kidding! Someone like you who's traveled across the dream world wouldn't just be lost like that...well, maybe in the Backrooms...I don't blame ya! 

So, what's the occasion for finding me here? My birthday? You...you remembered!? Wow! I never thought someone would have remembered my birthday like that! Gee, now that's what I call a reliable and loyal friend! How about I take you on a tour of the Backrooms! Don't worry, I know this place like the back of my palm! When you're with me in here, you'll never get lost! 

It gets lonely here often as I don't get many visitors, and those who visit, just stop by briefly. But you're a whole different story! You always come in and out of the Backrooms so it never feels lonely when you're around! I'm so happy you came by to spend time with me!! Let's go chief! We got lots of levels to explore! 

What? Don't make that face! We'll just explore the first 100 levels...no big deal, okay?!   - Figment