AUTUMN AND CAL’S FAMED PUMPKINS RETURN

By: Porter

It’s official: autumn has returned and it’s brought alongside a familiar face!

The Dimension Weather Prediction Service released their Seasonal Outlook and forecast an “average” autumn season this year. Indeed, temperatures around the general dream world have steadily gotten less hot with a more temperate feeling. At the same time, some areas around the dream world are seeing autumn foliage as the season gets underway.

“Yes, we’re seeing temperatures slightly drop to average autumn-like temperatures as summer is officially over,” DWPS senior meteorologist Neige said, “It’s starting to feel nice outside, you know, borderline ‘sweater weather’ for now. It’ll get cooler as the weeks go on, don’t worry.”

As autumn arrives back to the dream world, another familiar face has reappeared. That’s correct- it’s Cal from the Patch!

The Patch dimension also returned this week and as usual, Cal was seen ready to start providing pumpkins to visitors who came to check out his pumpkins.

“My pumpkins are ready for pickin’!” the pumpkin farmer told me, “Come and get yourself a pumpkin or two! It’s fall after all!”

For the second year in a row, the Dimension Disease Control and Protection agency of the DPF has personally inspected Cal’s pumpkins for anything abnormal. If you recall, in 2022, a disease spread in the dream world as a result of tainted pumpkin pies stemming from the Patch and other locations. The disease, later dubbed NEAP-1, was later eradicated swiftly through a cure.

Following a DDCP inspection, the pumpkins were given the green light.

“We found no traces of anything abnormal with Cal’s pumpkins,” a DDCP worker said, “They are safe to consume.”

Cal’s pumpkins, as well as the Patch dimension, are expected to be open to the public through the rest of the season. Visitors are asked to prepare for some foot traffic in and around the dimension.

‘4EVER 18’ SWITCHES TO AUTUMN RELATED CLOTHING 

By: Roman

The popular clothing retail chain, ‘4ever 18’ announced that they will be switching over to their autumn catalog for the season.

The clothing retailer is known for selling trendy clothes, typically in alignment with the current fashion trends and season. As autumn arrives, they will be rolling out their seasonal catalog. The catalog consists of typical autumn fashion like flannels, hoodies, sweaters, sweatpants, beanies, and more!

“Oh yeah I like shopping for seasonal clothes here,” one shopper told me, “I think this time I’m going to look for a flannel and maybe some jeans.”

“I love wearing sweaters so this time I’ll look for a few sweaters,” another shopper told me, “I mean, sweater weather is literally the best. Not cold or hot, but it’s just right. It’s crisp!”

I spoke with the manager of the store located at the Mall and asked what they expect from this season’s catalog.

“You know, I think this is the season we start to see sales go up- yes, even more than summer,” the manager told me, “Statistics show that autumn is actually the highest rated season that people prefer the most, even more than summer! I think the autumn catalog will do pretty well.”

When asked about how long the catalog will run for, the manager says they expect it to run until mid-November. 

“We sort of start our seasonal catalog about a week before the season actually sets in,” the manager admits, “We gotta get sales early ahead of the season, but it’s also to get people in the mood. Our autumn catalog will be replaced by the winter catalog sometime in mid-November. Of course, if for some strange reason it gets really cold before then, I guess we’ll have to drop it earlier, haha!”

You can always check their online website to view their entire catalog and order online! You can also visit a store in person to check out their clothing firsthand.

Q/A: Ask Nate

Dear Nate, who is the man in the hat humans claim to see sometimes?
By: Hugh Izee

Hiya Hugh! Oh, are you talking about Klobúk? I think you might be…

Well, who is Klobúk anyway? He’s the so-called “Hat Man” that some humans have reported seeing with their own eyes! Klobúk is an ancient dream demon who occasionally makes an appearance in the real world by visiting humans.

Klobúk doesn’t typically talk during his visits to humans. He appears as a tall man wearing a hat that lurks over people as they are experiencing ‘sleep paralysis’- a phenomenon caused by mischievous dream demons. ‘Sleep paralysis’ is a state in which a person is conscious to realize they are sleeping but not fully awake. In this state, they may see some strange things…including dream demons!

Klobúk himself only appears to humans who are in an altered state of mind not necessarily relating to sleep. In this altered state of mind, humans may experience hallucinations (hey that’s my thing!) and other weird visions. Klobúk will appear to them in an attempt to frighten them. Truth be told, he is only doing this to deter them from doing it again! Humans should not be able to see such things under the influence of certain substances. Klobúk is essentially their warning sign to avoid doing such things.

Most humans do not end up seeing Klobúk again, but those who do are met with stronger hallucinations and more frightening experiences. Klobúk will never hurt a human, but will attempt to persuade them to stop. He’s actually a pretty great guy if you’ve ever met him in the dream world! As for the hat he wears, well, he just really likes to wear hats. There’s not much more to it than that! I should go see what he’s been up to and ask him some more questions about the real world…

Dear Nate, what's the dream world's official currency?

By: Baggel O'Cash

Hello Baggel! Believe it or not, the dream world has an official currency!

In the early days of dream worldian society, a system of trade and barter was in place for a while. However, the Council at the time decided to scrap this system and implement an official currency. 

Soon, the Morph would be adopted! Named after the God of dreams, Morpheus, it replaced the faulty trade and barter system and has been in use since. Morphs consist of both coins and bills and can be defined by the symbol m̶, which is the letter m crossed through. 

For coins, there is the 1m̶, 5m̶, and 50m̶. For bills, they consist of 100m̶, 200m̶, 500m̶, and 1000m̶. While the Morph is the official currency of the dream world, regular human currency can also be exchanged, in certain dimensions.

Certain dimensions can accept human currency that also circulates within the dream world. To preserve a dimension's cultural significance, human currency that stems from that dimension in the real world can be exchanged as so. Though keep in mind that Morph are accepted everywhere in the dream world, so keep that in mind when traveling!

If you need to exchange human currency into Morphs or vise-versa, you can just visit a bank! They will be happy to convert your currency into whatever currency you want. On another note, it's important to have a safe place to keep all your money. Whether it be a wallet, purse, or a safe in your home, always keep your money safe! That's important!

I don't think the Morph is getting replaced anytime soon. I doubt the Council will suddenly come out to say that we need a new monetary system or currency. What if they decide to go back to trading and bartering? Geez, that would be going back in time…and I wasn't even around when that existed yet! Does that mean I'm still young…or am I already old anyway? Sheesh!