THE SUBLIMINAL TRIBUNE
Thursday, March 17, 2022
** SPECIAL EDITION **
Edition 29
DREAM WORLD CITIZENS FEELING EXTRA LUCKY
By: Porter
As Saint Patrick’s Day arrives, many dream world citizens are feeling extra lucky. I went around to ask various people what they consider to be their good luck charm.
Nate: My red scarf! I’ve worn it for ages now! I consider it my lucky charm!
Figment: Oh oh oh! This box here! And this radio! They keep me company here…
Telly: All of these televisions! It’s so joyous to have all these friends here with me!
Cal: My lucky pumpkin- which none of you better be thinking about stealing!
Almoral: Well, I can’t say Lucid because he’s not with me now, so I’ll say my cross hahaha!
Epsilon: My collar is what I consider to be my good luck charm.
Rainier: These boots! There hasn’t been a day that I haven’t worn them. They keep me cozy!
Cirrus: My glasses are definitely my good luck charm. After all, I can’t see without them!
Dylan: Gee…let’s see…well, not to be that person, but I guess my biggest luck charm is Epsilon!
Sylveran: Good old reliable here has never failed me. She always gets the shot right…
As for me, my good luck charm is my pencil! It’s always ready to write a good story for the paper and I never go anywhere without it. After all, it is any reporter’s good luck charm!
From everyone here at the Subliminal Tribune, happy St. Patrick’s Day!
STRANGE NOISES CONTINUE, DPF ASKS DWPS FOR ASSISTANCE
By: Roman
The Dimension Protection Force is continuing to receive tips and reports of strange noises coming from different dimensions in the dream world. The head rule enforcement agency has now asked the Dimension Weather Prediction Service for assistance with this matter.
According to internal reporting, the DPF is theorizing that the strange noises are a result of “dreamquakes”, which is a natural phenomenon in the dream world.
“Dreamquakes are a strange, but natural phenomenon that occurs in the dream world. They are typically a result of a ‘fault’ or ‘glitch’ in a human memory that can cause some distortions in some dimensions, but they do not last too long,” Cirrus of the DWPS tells me.
“The main problem with these tremors is that they cause shaking in dimensions, however, they can also cause noises just before and even after the main event.”
Despite noises being a sign of a dreamquake, the DWPS- which also monitors this type of activity- has not seen any sign of an incoming dreamquake.
“We’ve been handed the DPF reports of dimensions hearing strange noises and we haven’t seen any strange activity that would hint at a dreamquake, and that’s only for the outdoor dimension reports. Because we can’t monitor indoor dimensions, the DWPS has sent out a team of surveyors to indoor dimensions experiencing these noises to help collect data and come to a conclusion about any potential dreamquake activity.”
Cirrus tells me that it’s going to take about a week to analyze the data collected and make a determination as to whether or not these ongoing strange noises are part of a natural phenomenon.
“Give us about a week and we’ll let everyone know if this is natural in nature or not. In the meantime, we recommend everyone to continue reporting strange noises to the DPF and DWPS as well.”
If you experience a dreamquake or hear a strange noise, feel free to report it to the DPF or DWPS. More information can be respectively found on both of their official websites.
Q/A: Ask Epsilon
Dear Epsilon, what kind of information about the human world is restricted?
By: Hess Tory
Hello Hess. In the dream world, there is a lot of interest in the human world- Reality- among the citizens who live here. Believe it or not, a lot of information about the real world is free for people to look up.
While books are the best and most “orthodox” way to get information about anything, the internet down in the dream world is what most people use nowadays to find stuff out. There is a special website dedicated to showcasing different things in the real world, ranging from different topics and subjects called “RealHistory”- history about the real world.
Think of it like an online dictionary: you look up a specific topic or subject and a page for it comes up, detailing what it is, facts, pictures, charts, graphics, etc. The Website is very useful to see how the real world is like, and why the dream world exists because of it.
Despite many pages being open to the public, some of them are restricted. The Council restricts some information about the real world in an attempt to try and prohibit people from seeing very upsetting content. Let’s be real, there is a lot of evil in the real world, both now and then. Some pages about certain subjects and topics are locked to the general public so they do not stumble upon material that could be considered dark.
Is that to say that the Council is trying to portray the real world as a peaceful place just like the dream world? No, not at all. Everyone knows that there are bad things in the real world just like there are in the dream world. The Council just doesn’t want anyone here to view content that could make others upset or perhaps give people around here “ideas”...understand where I’m heading with this? Besides, any continuous attempts to view prohibited real world material may land you with a PIA violation from the DPF- or Peculiar Internet Activity- so don’t be too nosy.
Otherwise, a lot of information about the real world and humans is made readily available online. There are also books as well, although sadly, it appears people don’t seem too interested in books nowadays… I guess humans and dream world creatures have the same feeling towards books, but I still love them. Perhaps we’ll switch to books again someday.
Dear Epsilon, what is your favorite pasta dish?
By: Al Fredo
Hello Al. My favourite pasta dish is fettuccine alfredo pasta. I make a very good dish…would you care to try some?
Dear Epsilon, how many other siblings do you have?
By: Pham Eli
Hello Pham. I have four other older siblings, with two girls and two other boys- I am the youngest. I can’t say I’m on good terms with most of them.
Dear Epsilon, what are you favorite things to draw?
By: Artie Tess
Hello Artie. Whenever I paint, I tend to just paint whatever is on my mind. It could be a mountain landscape, or perhaps a bowl of fruit. Some days I may paint a portrait of a person, and other days I may paint places of stories I’ve read. It just depends.
Dear Epsilon, what do you think is causing the weird noises in the dream world?
By: Vaul Yume
Hello Vaul. I’m not sure what’s causing the strange noises in the dream world. In fact, I heard strange noises coming from the Apartments just the other day. It did spook me, but I’m not really an expert on these types of things, and I don’t have much experience dealing with weird noises from back in my DPF days. I hope it’s nothing serious though. I’m sure that mystery will be solved soon enough.
Upcoming Events:
Now- St. Patrick’s Party 2022: Dress up in green and follow the rainbow- it leads to gold!
March 24- April Fool’s Party 2022 Construction: What dimensions do you think will get a look for this party? Personally, I think all of them should.
March 24- New seasonal dimension: Smell that? It’s probably Spring!
March 31- April Fool’s Party 2022: Could the strange noises be anything related to this event?