THE SUBLIMINAL TRIBUNE

Thursday, May 26, 2022

Edition 39

NOIR EVENT DEEMED SUCCESSFUL

By: Oswald

The ongoing noir event in the dream world has been deemed a success, according to the organizers of the event.

With the correct permits provided to the DPF, several individuals were able to transform a few dimensions into monochrome rooms, with many likening to the old detective film-like aesthetic, and even old cartoon-like!

“We’re really glad that people have been using their imaginations to act out their own mystery cases or perhaps filming their own old style cartoons,” Artisan of the Cafe told me, “We didn’t expect all of these cool projects to come from it!”

“Even the Club is seeing some interesting takes!” Techno, a DJ at the Club dimensions said to me, “We have a few projects in here that are happening like those acting out to be a part of the Mafia and even those filming silent-movie type films on the dance floor. It’s pretty rad!”

Other dream world citizens have also shared their opinions and thoughts about the event.

“This reminds me of the days before televisions were in color!” Telly said, “Just pure black and white…oh, how I miss those days!”

“These rooms look so cool! Certainly beats being out in the rain, that’s for sure,” Dylan told me.

“Wow! These black and white dimensions sure look amazing! Hehe, uh…now that I think about it, it makes me sad knowing that this is what Lucid sees all the time…” Almoral said somberly.

According to Artisan, the event will be cleaned up by next week.

“Yup, enjoy it while you can! We’ll be restoring everything back to normal in a week.”

One week left before the event is cleared. Those attending and participating should make their final projects before the week comes to a close and noir dimensions are back to normal.

SPRING WINDING DOWN, SUMMER APPROACHES

By: Roman

Spring in the dream world is officially coming to a close soon.

According to the Dimension Weather Prediction Service, spring in the dream world this year fell below expectations to many in the agency.

In March, it was forecasted that spring would have been “near-above average,” but the data is now pointing to the fact that it appears to have been an average season after all. While falling below expectations, the weather agency isn’t disappointed with the data.

“Weather is constantly changing and our forecasts won’t always be perfect,” Cirrus explains, “We had predicted a slightly above average spring season, but we got an average season- you know, nothing weird, the usual stuff.”

Now that the spring season is coming to a close, eyes are towards the summer season, to which the DWPS is giving an early hint about what’s to come.

“While the full seasonal outlook comes on June 1, I can tell you that summer in the dream world looks to be average,” Cirrus says, “What does this mean? Well, summer is going to be like any other year: hot, humid, scattered afternoon thunderstorms, some severe thunderstorms, and a chance for 1-2 tropical cyclones.”

When asked about the chance for abnormal events, Cirrus says it’s too early to tell.

“It’s still a little early to tell, but check back with our agency on June 1 which will roll out the entire seasonal outlook for you to check out. However, I can say that models are pointing out that it shouldn’t be crazy like last winter was.”

The DWPS will publish its Spring 2022 report soon, which will detail all the data and weather events that took place in the dream world within the last three months. The summer season begins on June 1 until August 31. For more information, forecasts, or resources, please visit the DWPS website or visit your nearest forecasting office for additional help.

Q/A: Ask Porter

Dear Porter, how did you end up in the dream world?
By: Noi Klipp

Hello Noi! My arrival in the dream world was like most other humans. I was walking home from work one day and presto! I had fallen through the sidewalk and into this very weird environment. I eventually learned that this was the infamous Backrooms, but making my way around, I eventually found a hole in the wall where I found Figment and their portals! Figment answered a lot of my questions, but they also pointed me in the right direction for more help. It was definitely quite strange, but I found myself adapting quickly!

Dear Porter, what did you used to do in the real world?
By: True Jobs

Hello True! Back in the real world, I was actually a rookie reporter working for a local newspaper in my hometown in England. To be honest, getting scoops was hard and I didn’t really have a lot of support. However, applying for the Subliminal Tribune was a game changer, because the scoops down here are so much better than back in the real world!

Dear Porter, how’s your job as a reporter?
By: Reed R.

Hello Reed! My job as a reporter down here is quite fun. I really love getting to go out and do interviews, talk to people, and report on the biggest things going on. You really get a kick out of talking to all the different kinds of people around here! Of course, I also get to befriend and work with amazing co-workers who work alongside me. We all support each other very much!

Dear Porter, do you miss home?
By: H. O. Mesik

Hello H! It’s mixed feelings now. At first, it was always on my mind. I left a lot of people behind, that’s true, but I was also often ridiculed for being a rookie reporter trying to get by. Once I landed a job here, there was no judgement or ridicule. So, I suppose I miss home sometimes, but living in the English enclave in the District- well, it’s not as lonely or homesick.

Dear Porter, what’s your favorite dimension?
By: Fay Burr

Hello Fay! There are a lot of dimensions in the dream world that I enjoy, so picking a favourite is tricky stuff… Hmm, oh I know! My favourite dimension is the Cafe! I love going there whenever I can because not only do I enjoy coffee, but I also enjoy the pastries they make!

Dear Porter, what are your thoughts on Lucid?
By: Connie Vick

Hello Connie! I’m well aware of who Lucid is, based on the bits and pieces I’ve heard about him. While information on him is restricted online, I’d really love to land an exclusive interview with Lucid himself! Just based on the things I’ve heard, I don’t think Lucid did anything particularly wrong? As far as I’m aware, Lucid hadn’t done something incredibly bad like murder someone, so…what’s the big deal with visiting the real world? It is against the rules, but it’s not like Lucid did something incredibly bad or shifted something in the universe. I’d really like to sit down and talk to him and know the truth! Maybe someday, I hope!

Dear Porter, what do you wish for your birthday this year?
By: Kay K.

Hello Kay! The one thing I’ve always wanted to find is a famed enchanted ink pen. You may wonder what that is, but it’s quite interesting! Many years ago, an ordinary ink pen was enchanted so that anything that gets written with it becomes reality! It’s quite incredible actually, because imagine all of the grand things that can happen with that pen! Unfortunately, that pen is completely lost somewhere in the dream world, and no one’s been able to find it. Still, it’d definitely beat my own pencil and pen that I use! I guess it could also be used wrongfully if fallen into the wrong hands…hmm, I guess some things should remain lost? Still cool though!

Upcoming Events:

Now- Birthday Party: Porter’s taken this week off to come celebrate his birthday! Come on down and spend some time with him in the Party dimension!

Now- April Fool’s Party 2022 archived: The silliest party ever gets its place in the rewind room. Relive the weirdness all over again!

Now- Another portal opens: Why did the window go to the doctor? Because it was in pane.

June 2- New torch item: Light your way through the dream world, now in multiple colors!

June 2- Beach returns: Summer’s coming up which means the beach is back just in time!