THE SUBLIMINAL TRIBUNE

Thursday, September 21, 2023

Edition 108

CAL’S MAZE OF CORN RETURNS WITH LIMITED ACCESS

By: Porter

As it does so annually, Cal’s strange maze of corn has returned, but this year is a little different.

For many years now, Cal’s maze was not accessible to the public. Cal has always been unwelcoming of people venturing into his maze, but it seems he’s changing the tides this time around. According to Cal, only a few select people may be allowed into his maze at a time.

“I’m in a pretty good mood this year!” Cal exclaimed, “I wanna let a few people in at a time. Of course, before you go in, you’re gonna have to come to me and ask for permission! I don’t want trespassers in there!”

The maze of corn can be kind of confusing, especially because a strange fog settles in and it slightly drops visibility. On top of that, there is nothing but hay and stalks of corn wherever you go. 

“Yes, the maze can get confusin’, but if you’re brave enough, you can do it!” Cal says, “I say brave because they say spooky stuff goes on in the maze… Hahaha, I’m just messin’ with y’all! Or am I? Only one way to find out…”

Cal’s maze has always been a subject of mysteries and theories. Many people haven’t actually been in the maze to know what lies within it. Some have speculated that Cal might keep something quite rare in there, while others speculate that Cal might simply keep farm equipment in there for some reason.

“Maybe Cal’s hiding a super duper secret, like a radioactive pumpkin?” a local resident says, “I mean, why else would there be a maze to guard it?”

“It’s probably something as simple as where he keeps extra farming equipment and machinery,” another local resident says, “It would explain why he doesn’t want people in there. He doesn’t want people to touch his equipment.”

Whatever the case, Cal’s maze is open with limited access. Visitors who wish to venture in it should first speak with Cal at the Patch for permission, though not everyone will be granted access.

FASHION SHOW IS OFFICIALLY OVER

By: Roman

The second ever fashion show in the Cafe’s book room is officially over.

The event is being catagorized as a success by its organizers who saw many different people show up in their best outfits! Rouge, one of the key organizers, is thrilled to have seen a bigger audience than the first time.

“I’m beyond thrilled to have seen such a response to our second fashion show!” Rouge exclaimed, “I think even more people came to check it out than the first time. I’m calling this a success!”

Rouge says that those who came were pleasantly excited over the inclusion of new themes for this round. Besides the fashion show being a success, Rouge reveals that it isn’t the last time they’ll be coming around.

“Oh trust me, we’ll be back for another fashion event!” they said, “We’re not entirely sure of the date yet, but we’ll be back!”

When asked about new themes, Rouge says that they are already thinking about new themes to incorporate the next time the fashion show returns.

“Hmm, we have some ideas of what to do next time, but whether each day should be an entirely new theme or have another mix of old and new…that’s still up in the air! I guess we’ll just see,” Rouge says.

The organizers want to thank the Cafe dimension for their cooperation into letting them host their event in that dimension. They also want to thank everyone who came along to participate! They say that details for the next fashion show are not available yet, but once everything gets into place, they will let everyone know via social media and through the newspaper of course!

Q/A: Ask Nate

Dear Nate, do you need an identification to traverse across the dream world?

By: Veriff Icayshun

Hi Veriff! Oh yes, this is one of the biggest things you need to remember when you’re out in the dream world. Having some form of identification on you is very important! It lets patrol officers know who you are, where you live, and other details about yourself. I’ll explain more!

The best form of identification is your Personal License Identification Card, or PLIC, that automatically gets issued to you when you turn a year old! Within the DPF, there is a small agency branch called the Bureau of Licenses that issues various forms of licenses, including PLICs. Your PLIC includes information such as your full name, where you live, your age at the time of issuance, the color of your eyes, hair, skin, your height at the time of issuance, your gender, sex, your species classification, date it was issued, when it expires, and an important I.D. Registration Number. A photo of yourself is also printed on the card!

Each PLIC that is issued to you lasts for ten years since the date it was issued. You’ll need to apply for a renewal about six months before it expires so you can get your new one in on time. When you re-apply, you’ll have to resubmit information if anything’s changed in those ten years, but you must always submit a new photo. If for some reason, something about you changes before it’s time to renew, you can always submit a PLIC Update Request with the Bureau of Licenses so they can change a detail on your card. This doesn’t extend your original renewal date, however, so keep that in mind!

Of course, your PLIC can be suspended or revoked for various reasons, particularly if you commit a criminal offense. All people convicted of a crime get their PLICs revoked until they complete their sentencing. For people who don’t have a PLIC, you may be taken in by a DPF Patrol officer for questioning, unless you’re a human from the real world. You’d be taken to the Bureau of Real World Affairs for assistance instead. If a human or anyone who doesn’t have a license wants one, they’ll be asked to apply for one. In the meantime, you’ll be issued a temporary license that will restrict some of your travel in the dream world for six months.

Applying for a PLIC is not difficult! When you apply, it takes about 4-6 weeks for it to arrive either by mail or by going to the Bureau of Licenses to pick it up. Everyone eligible for a PLIC will have it as it’s important for travel! Of course, there are more types of licenses…like the one you’re issued if you’re a DPF agent! But that’s another story…

Dear Nate, do you have any siblings?

By: Fammy Lee

Hi Fammy! Well, that’s an interesting question! Haha, uh, you see it’s not something that I necessarily talk about, but it’s also not something that I’m afraid to talk about. To put it simply, I do.

I only have one other sibling and he’s my older brother. We all call him “V” which is what his actual name starts with. I don’t really talk about him… Not that I’m on bad terms with him or anything- no, nothing like that! In fact, he is a pretty good person! I keep in touch with him every now and then, but he lives a pretty quiet and isolated life.

V is actually an author who writes novels! He likes to write mystery, historical fiction, and young adult novels. They’re pretty interesting as I’ve read all of them! The thing is, V has always been a bit to himself. He’s not all a bad person nor does he keep me away on purpose, he just likes being left to himself. Regardless, he has his own home and career. I don’t talk about him much because well, there’s not much to say. He keeps it slow and easy going, but we chat every now and then.

V actually lives in the rural dream world. For privacy reasons, I won’t say where, but like I said, he likes being away from the hustle and bustle of the District. I visit him every few months in person, at least when he’s not busy writing a novel and up for hours on end trying to get it to be perfect. He’s a bit of a perfectionist!

Regardless, V is a kind, simple, but reclusive person. He has no problems with anyone, no fights, no drama…he’s just…V. I admire him though! Growing up together is a special memory for me and I can always count on him for anything! If you wanna know a bit about his writing, I recommend checking out one of his older novels, “The Dock Disappearances,” which is a mystery novel about people going missing under mysterious circumstances at a dock where its said a mysterious boat pulls in every seven days much to the mystery of the local residents. A good read, I promise!

Dear Nate, what are you wishing for on your birthday this year?

By: Cay K.

Hi Cay! Gee, well, I don’t really ask for much on birthdays anymore! It’s true that once you live a long life, you do stop wishing for things on your birthday. I mean, what more can you want out of a life this long?! 

The only real thing I want is to keep making memories with the people I care about. Lucid always tells me that each day is never a guaranteed promise and that I should always try to live my life to the best that I can and make memories with those I care about. Within the past year, I’ve held that advice closer, especially after a whirlwind of events that have happened!

You know, I just want to keep making memories with those I care about. Maybe I don’t want something shiny, fancy, or expensive. Maybe I just want to spend time with friends who make life worth living! And of course, there’s Lucid. Gosh… I wouldn’t have come this far without him. I always tell him I’m thankful for meeting him and having him in my life. I want to keep making more memories with him. That’s all that I want for my birthday this year.

Upcoming Events:

Now- Corn Maze 2023: Time to head back into the Corn Maze! We’ll be tagging along with Epsilon and Dylan this year who both can’t wait to see what lies within the corn stalks…

Now- Birthday Party: Happy birthday to Nate! This dream demon is turning another year older and he’s sure going to spend time today celebrating with one other particular dream demon…

September 28- Time to get spooky: Hmm, something doesn’t feel right. What’s that beyond the fog? Oh, it’s just a tree. Right? Yes.

October 5- Biz Mart goes dark: The annual spookification of Biz Mart will be upon us once more. Sid’s just gotta look for the Halloween decorations, kill the lights, and make it spooky!